there's a desperate self deprecating abuse i'm willing to take.

there's a decent amount of self injury i'll endure.

there's a lot of mind fucks i'll tolerate.

i ignore problems.

this time i'll change. i said i would haha.

i'll hurt myself before i hurt you. this will in turn hurt you. i will turn myself into a weapon because i don't know how to detach my heart from the gun that's willing to shoot right through me to get you.

i'll make this all a beautiful disaster and remember that things will always be fucked up.